Age Gap: Older Women And Younger Men

As stigma lessens for women dating younger men, couples tout the benefits of the age gap.


When he moved to Los Angeles, Charlie Capen, 20 at the time, could have joined his friends hitting the clubs. Instead, he fell in love with a woman eight years older, an age difference that has provided far more benefits than challenges — except for one thing.

"When she'd start to talk about Duran Duran or Erasure, I was like, 'What are you talking about?'" said Charlie Capen, now 31 and married to Avara, 39, for eight years.

Younger Men Love Older Women

Aside from light teasing about divergent pop culture references, and occasional jokes that Avara will trade Charlie in for a younger model, the age gap barely registers in their romance, even as society still looks askance at the pairing of an older woman with a younger man.

Though hardly as scandalous as it was in Mrs. Robinson's day — Hollywood's proud examples include Mariah Carey (10 years older than her husband, actor Nick Cannon), Julianne Moore (nine years older than her husband, director Bart Freundlich), and Geena Davis (15 years older than her husband, plastic surgeon Reza Jarrahy) — studies show people disapprove of age gap relationships in general and especially those in which the woman is older, which they deem most likely to fail.

But to many people actually involved in older woman/younger man pairings, the age difference can be a boon, if it matters at all.

"(It was attractive) to be with someone on their own two feet, less self-centered, interested in doing stuff not based so much on distractions but on real life," said Charlie Capen, an actor and co-founder of the blog.

Avara Capen, an executive assistant in the entertainment industry, was drawn to Charlie's youthful idealism. "He wasn't beaten down by life," she said. "He had this spark for life that is infectious."

As the years pass, age matters even less, though Avara Capen said she's feeling the physical toll of approaching 40 as their son turns 3. The couple waited to start a family because "it was very important to me that Charlie really have a chance to pursue his dreams without the stress and responsibility of having a child," she said. "I wish there was a way to have started our family earlier."

The author summary:

For true love, age difference is just a number, a young man like old woman, today, is the trend of The Times. If you want to own more perfect love, you will find that older women who have more taste.

A brand new dating service called AgeSingle has been recently launched, which helps older women who seek to date or befriend younger men.